I did something big today and I’m happy that I did it. I feel better for it, more settled and less edgy, ready for the world.
I went for a walk.
Doesn’t sound much to others or when said out loud but it is for me. Since my meds changed two weeks ago, my motivation and energy have been low, with more sleeping than normal. It’s to be expected as I’m taking two sets of meds, tapering one in while reducing the other out. It’ll be bumpy for a while but less so than coming off one completely and onto another over a period of a few weeks, which was not a palatable option, given the circumstances.
Today, I dropped Lady M off at the train station, took the kids to school and was walking around the local lake by 8:30am. A beautiful morning with the sun splitting the heavens, the lake is part of the country park and is filled with wild birds. I could hazard a guess at what kind but I’ll not get past ducks or a big thing with feathers and a beak, so suffice to say that there are lot of them in a perfect environment.
As you can see from the above images, there are a lot breaks in the trees to the view of the lake and it is glorious on a day like today. From what I understand, this was a mineral pit at one time that was cleared, filled with water and was turned into the country park it is today, with a path created around the outside of the lake, seating in clearings to view the lake, have a picnic, spend time.
The only downside is the dual carriageway that passes nearby. The noise is constant and does conflict with the peaceful scene in the park. However, it is a beautiful scene not that far from the town.
It did seem like a metaphor for my mental state at the moment, taking in the beautiful sites with a load of noise in the background which symbolises my thoughts and outside toxic influences that drone on constantly, pervasive as well as intrusive. All I want is to walk in the sun, taking in peaceful surroundings but outside forces keep dragging me back in, relentlessly droning on, all in a machine like way, driving their agenda.
I’ll take the step forward as it comes and today was a win, progress. That will do for me.
In the words of Shrek ‘That’ll do, Donkey. That’ll do.’